Panache

Letting go is one of the hardest journeys one goes through in their life. It can involve detachment from anything like past relationships, toxic situations, people’s expectations, fear and insecurity, and the need for control. Nothing can make the process easier.

However, if you are self-aware and understand what you can go through when you are letting go, it will be of great help. Below are some things that will make letting go easier for you.

Acceptance.

The first step in the journey is accepting that you need to let go. It can be letting go of a toxic thing or something that does not hold any value in your life. Acceptance is also the first and the most significant step you need in your journey of letting go.

It also requires a lot of effort. Your mind or heart may tell you a million excuses to stop you from letting go. But acceptance is not a thought that something is not serving you anymore. It is the determination or the conclusion. It may come as a deep sigh when you have finally made a decision. Or you have had enough.

When you accept the fact that you need to let go. It is also important because, with that determination, you are already halfway there. It may feel like a relief. As if a burden has been lifted off. And now you can see things clearly or from a different perspective.

Also read: How to live for yourself?

Become aware of what is stopping you.

Once you have accepted that you need to let go of something. The next step is to be aware of what has been keeping you so far. Why were you there in the first place? What brought you to this state or to that stage? Knowing the answer to these questions is necessary.

Als knowing the answers can be deeply intuitive and highly soul-searching. You may have to think a lot before you come to any conclusion. Sometimes, there can be several things that could be keeping you in a certain toxic state or a painful situation.

The easiest answer is to realize that it has always been you, who had been keeping you stuck. And since now you have decided that you will let go. You just need to put down the burden, accept the situation for what it is, and move on.

Also read: 10 signs you are sabotaging yourself.

Also read: 10 ways to stop sabotaging yourself.

Feel the pain of detachment.

When you have invested time, resources, effort, and yourself into something, it is hard to let go. This is the most difficult stage when you feel the pain of letting go. This is also when most people either distract themselves or fear the most.

They would rather sit through the toxicity than feel the excessive pain of detachment for their greater good. However, this is also when your self-awareness and determination play an important role. Instead of pushing yourself into distraction or abusing habits, you need to learn to sit through the pain.

You need to really process those emotions in a healthy way. So, you don’t only understand your involvement with the things you want to leave behind. But you would be able to deconstruct the old you and become the new you that you will need in the future.

The process of destruction and re-construction is difficult but one has to go through it with resilience, self-discipline, and determination.

Also read: 10 signs you have an anxious attachment style relationship.

Work on your mindset.

As mentioned above, you need to re-construct your new identity. And this will happen while you are trying to let go. Therefore, you also need to work on your mindset.

Firstly, you cannot move forward with the same mindset you got into it in the first place. Once you get enough determination you want to move on and let go. You are already on the verge of working on changing your mindset. It can be a constant struggle.

However, your ray of hope can be the new you that would come out after you win over yourself. This new you would need a new mindset. And it will be stronger and ready for any tough situation in life.

Working on your mindset may look like making stronger boundaries, being more focused, changing in perspective, or becoming a whole new person altogether.

Take the leap of faith.

One of the things that scares people to let go is that they don’t know what lies on the other side of the fence. They don’t know what will happen to them if they let go of something. They are scared because they are too attached and too dependent on their old self and they can’t move on.

Therefore, it is important to have enough courage to take that leap of faith. You may take some time to prepare yourself. This preparation may involve strengthening yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, financially, or spiritually. You may take as much time as you need.

However, it is important to have that confidence and trust in yourself that you will be fine once you let go of something. Remember, that only the strongest and the most courageous people can do it. So, if you are able to do it, you are among those people. And you can be proud of yourself.

Step out of the comfort zone.

To become stronger and more confident in yourself, you may have to step out of your comfort zone. You already know that no one has grown while they have been living in their shell. However, the true test of your courage and your personality is when you step out of your comfort zone and try to touch the horizons that you were never familiar with.

No doubt, it is scarier than you can anticipate. But trying out new things will fill you up with more joy and confidence. It will also open doors for new opportunities in your life. All you need to do is try something you have never done before. It is one of the best ways to build resilience for the pain of detachment.

Trust yourself and change the plasticity of your mind. For now, your mind can be fearful. But once you are ready for your life’s adventure, you can change your brain by pursuing new things to develop a new and better personality for yourself.

Be in the present moment.

Another major factor that can help you with the pain of detachment and the fear of letting go is to practice being in the present moment. Mindfulness is the best tool to help you go through each day one day at a time.

You will feel traumatic about what you have endured in the past. Or you may feel anxious about what lies in the belly of the future. No matter what happens, both those states are not going to help you. They are not sustainable as well. Therefore, it is important to practice mindfulness.

Being in the present moment will give you the peace that you need to heal yourself when you are trying to let go and move on. It will help you to live better and strategize in a better way.

Embrace the new You.

As explained above, letting go also means that you let go of the old you. You also reconstruct yourself. That means, you not only let go of the old values. You need to learn to accept and love the new version of you.

At times, the regret of losing the older version of you may make you sad. But accept that you need to become like this for a better and brighter future. You had to leave the old you to upgrade for a better life and more happiness.

Embracing the new you might coin a lot of questions from the people surrounding you. But until you are stronger and sure of yourself this is what you need. You don’t have to worry about people’s opinions.

Take time to heal.

The whole process of letting go is not easy. It is a complex set of emotions that can barely involve a set process to follow. Letting go can also take a lot of time. This time may range from a few weeks to decades. And sometimes, you may think of it after spending half a lifetime on healing.

But giving yourself that time full of love and care is necessary. Take time to heal as much as you think, you need. Because that is the best service you will be doing to yourself in this process.

No one ever says that letting go is easy. However, the feeling of freedom, the enthusiasm for building a new life, and the refreshing thought of starting from square one can give you all the hope you need to do right by yourself.

Seek help and Therapy.

Letting go can be deeply personal and require a lot of strength from you. However, you are not alone in the quest to discover yourself and build a better life for yourself. Help is always available to those who ask for it.

You can always ask for help from a trusted friend or a therapist. They will not only introduce you to your true strengths. But they can also help you develop the strength to move on and build a better life.

A therapist can offer you an easier and more guided path to healing and self-recovery which is much needed to let go.

Also read: 9 reasons to de-stigmatize therapy.

Conclusion.

Letting go is not easy but it also feels worth it when you are free and have healed from the process of it. It will require a lot of love, self-compassion, patience, and determination from you. But once you have made up your mind, you will open yourself to a life that is much happier and more fulfilled than ever.