Panache

Around 15 million people in America suffer from social anxiety. Among this population, around 57 percent are adults. This report is according to an article in Psychology Today.

We may have become socially advanced through social media. However, this technological closeness has induced more social anxiety in people than ever before.

Below are some signs that can state, you are not an introvert. Instead, you have social anxiety.

You are scared of judgment.

When someone hears about social anxiety, they immediately understand that the person must be scared of speaking in public or appearing in a crowd. However, social anxiety is much more serious than that.

It is not about stage fright or being scared of public appearances. Social anxiety is the fear of judgment. The kind of fear that makes people freeze or become numb. It is not that you avoid being in public altogether. But even if you are asked to speak in front of a handful of people, you become so nervous that you can barely move.

This fear of judgment can stop you from networking with people. You would not only avoid your friends but would also avoid any situation where you have to interact. You would be scared of questions or interventions. And will keep on thinking about what people are thinking about you.

You avoid interaction with people.

A glaring sign of social anxiety is you avoid interacting with people. But it is not limited to that. Avoiding interaction can range from avoiding eye contact to avoiding replying to emails, texts, or calls.

This means a socially anxious person not only avoids people right in front of them. But they avoid any interaction whatsoever.  This avoidant behavior can be because of multiple factors. It also depends on the situation as well.

But if it is a hindrance for you to network, land an opportunity, build a relationship, or open up to someone, then it comes in the range of social anxiety. And it immediately needs to be addressed and understood. 

You avoid any kind of attention.

When you are a socially anxious person, you not only avoid any interaction. But you also start to avoid any kind of attention towards you. You are not comfortable when people look at you. You even become awkward when a camera lens is pointed towards you.

It is the opposite of attention-seeking. When you feel socially awkward and realize that not only bad work would get you attention, excellent work will also get you attention. Therefore, to avoid that, you try to be an average performer. You even start dressing down so people don’t notice you.

You think that if you are part of the crowd you will not catch anyone’s attention. Therefore, you will remain safe in your cocoon or your comfort zone. You may think this is because you are an introvert. But it can also be because you have social anxiety.

Overthinking about situations in the past and the future.

It’s 2 am and you are trying your best to fall asleep, yet your brain chooses the moment of embarrassment that happened years ago to keep you awake at this hour. You start thinking about all the people who were present there. And you start imagining what they must be thinking about you.

This does not stop there. But you start thinking about how you will interact with them if you see them. This thought alone not only makes you anxious. But it also makes you squirm overthinking the whole situation. You may think it is a common happening as it has been normalized on the internet.

But it is not that common unless you have social anxiety. Your anxiety makes you overthink every interaction you have or going to have in the future. However, the tragedy is you overthink the situation so vehemently that you decide not to interact with people again.

This will not only worsen your anxiety but it can be bad for your mental and emotional health as well.

You have started practicing avoidant behaviors.

When you have social anxiety, you are bound to develop some coping mechanisms over a period. These avoidant behaviors may include several things. Like choosing a profession where you don’t have to interact with multiple people on a regular basis like a work-from-home job.

You do not feel okay at social gatherings or networking events so you go out of your way to mark them in advance and avoid them by making concrete excuses. Alcoholism and drug addiction can also be a coping mechanism because you can’t stand crowds or public attention.

Being embarrassed about small things, making self-deprecating jokes, and being funny when you feel sad inside are all coping mechanisms. In this way, you create a different personality for the world to see. Because you are scared that people will see what you are.

These kinds of coping mechanisms may give rise to imposter syndrome as well. You will never feel truly achieved or talented as you will feel this is not you. Instead, it is your alter ego that everyone likes.

You judge yourself too much.

Another big sign of social anxiety is you not only think about yourself in a certain manner. But you also think about what people are thinking about you. Hence, every interaction turns into a thesis in your head. You will nitpick every smile, every hand-shake, the choice of words, body language, eye contact, etc.

This will not only make you awkward within the situation but it also leads to too much overthinking. The worst part is you will never come to a positive conclusion. Even though, your interaction was good enough. You will still overthink it later.

You will nit-pick everything and start judging yourself in a manner that will destroy your image in your own eyes. You will start to think you are so bad that you should not meet people anymore.

You do not only have a self-image. But you start seeing yourself as how people would have thought about you. You see yourself with others’ eyes. And conclude negative things.

You need support in social situations.

One of the biggest signs that you are awkward in social situations is you need someone’s support when you are in the crowd. Imagine you go to a club with your best friend. And your best friend leaves you alone in the crowd.

Soon, you start getting nervous. Your nervousness turns to anxious thoughts. And within seconds, you start hyperventilating due to anxiety. This is when you know you cannot survive in crowds without support. This may not be the first time that must have happened.

Another sign is you holding on to the glass of champagne in a get-together and this glass is the only thing that is saving you from feeling the presence of the people around you. As you are not comfortable at all. You get sweaty, and jittery and may feel like crying.

When it comes to support in social situations, you may depend on the person or an object. But it is a clear sign that you have social anxiety.

You are worried people will see your anxiety.

As mentioned above, social anxiety not only troubles you on the inside but also makes you overthink how other people are thinking about you. Once, you start thinking in this manner, it will start a snowball effect in your mind.

When you are in a social situation, and you become aware that you are socially awkward or having social anxiety, you would want to hide it from the people. But since your anxiety is already increasing. You would want to hide it and fail again.

This will not only start a conflict inside you but people can clearly see it through your facial expressions, body language, speech, or tone. At times, you will notice people noticing your nervousness which will make you more nervous.

As a result, you would want to run away or hide and never come out of your shell. This is another glaring sign that you have high social anxiety.

Conclusion.

According to an article published in Psychology Today. Most of the people suffering from social anxiety never ask for help. Or it can take them a decade to realize and ask for help to either develop healthy coping mechanisms or cope with it completely.

Do not be among those people. Seek help or therapy as soon as possible when you see signs of social anxiety. The more you procrastinate over it, the more you will be stopping yourself from living a fulfilled life.

Also read: How to cope with social anxiety?

Also read: 10 instant hacks to deal with your anxiety.