Panache

Can you imagine not being able to live your dream life because of your social anxiety? More than 57 percent of adults in America are fighting with some kind of social anxiety after the pandemic hit us.

Do not let it stop you. Below are some ways and life-changing techniques through which you can win your fight against social anxiety. Read on and conquer it.

Also read: 8 glaring signs of social anxiety.

Get rid of the fear of judgment.

One of the biggest factors in social anxiety is the fear of judgment. As an anxious person, you keep thinking about what others think about you. How do they perceive you? Or how they judge you?

But you need to think that you have no control over how someone perceives you. And thinking about it is like wasting your energy on things that are not in your hands. Also, most of the people judge others based on their own insecurities. They immediately become competitive and start thinking about what you have that they don’t.

Your anxiety makes you pick every detail when you interact with someone. So, while they are busy thinking about the good things about you and how you have what they don’t. Your anxiety makes you believe that they must be thinking about you essentially, hence making you panic or nervous.

Don’t overthink about your embarrassing moments.

Let’s do an exercise. Pick a random person from your high school or school days. And think about one embarrassing moment of them. Most of the people won’t be able to remember anything.

Similarly, the embarrassing moment that keeps you awake at night is not remembered by anyone. You just have it in your permanent memory because you were and are ashamed of it. Therefore, it is hard for you to get rid of it.

Depending on your age, most people won’t even be able to put an image to your name. In this fast-paced, ever-changing world, people are too busy surviving, so you better stop overthinking those embarrassing moments that probably happened a decade ago. Take a deep breath and go to sleep.

You are not your anxiety.

According to a study, most people take more than a decade to find out that they have social anxiety. By this time, their anxious behaviors have become part of their personality. It is hard for them to understand themselves and segregate between their personalities and their anxiety.

Therefore, it is hard to introspect a little and understand your true self. This will help you realize who you truly are and what your anxiety makes you feel. You may not be an introvert but your social anxiety makes you nervous in the crowd and you quickly get exhausted when you step out.

You need to have a firm belief that you are not your anxiety. You cannot let a single emotion define your existence. Identify your potential and understand that you are much more than what you feel when you are in front of people. Once you realize that you would create a significant decrease in your anxious thoughts.

Everyone is worried about their own image and not yours.

A person with social anxiety always worries about how others think about them. However, most of them don’t even think that others are also thinking in the same way about you. They are also worried about how you will perceive them. Whether they left a good impression on you or not.

When you have social anxiety, you give too much power to the external factors. In the process, you not only make yourself weak but you also start doubting yourself. This is not good for your self-esteem and self-confidence.

In your fight against social anxiety, all you need to do is to take your power back. Stop giving space to other people in your mind and shift your focus to yourself. You will feel much better.

They don’t know you the way you do.

How many people have you met in your life so far? How many people do you meet every day in your life? Do they all know you? How much do they know you? I am sure, as compared to what you know about yourself, they don’t know anything.

Every person you ever meet has a perception about you in their head. This perception is also based on their beliefs, biases, personalities, and experiences. They may say or believe a thousand things about you, but it won’t affect your personality or living in any manner whatsoever.

Therefore, you don’t need to care about them. You don’t need to be worried about what they think or the perception they make. It is not in your hands. Therefore, move on from this fear, worry, or thought process.

Don’t anticipate what others will feel.

When a person has social anxiety, they not only think about the past but also keep anticipating their future as well. Suppose, you have a meeting tomorrow. Even though, you have done your best to prepare for that meeting, your anxiety won’t let you sleep.

In the middle of the night, you would stay awake thinking about the reactions of people. How will they react to a certain thing? How are you going to combat that reaction? What if they don’t like your strategy? Or will they reject it completely?

This whole chain starts from a simple “what if” and gradually converts into a giant snowball making you question your whole existence. But you can counter it by stopping someone else’s reaction. Stop anticipating how they will feel or react.

This is your anxiety driving you towards madness. You can’t know what will happen, so stop anticipating it. Do not let your anxiety fool you. Instead, take the charge in your hands and tell your ever-running thoughts to stop.

Change your circle if you feel embarrassed with them.

Sometimes, social anxiety is not rooted in you. Rather, it is an induced behaviour, that you acquire while you are with certain people. Imagine, yourself among a group of friends where you are comfortable, and can emotionally open up without any fear of judgment.

On the contrary, if you are with the people with whom you are not comfortable. You constantly think about adjusting yourself for their validation or your vibes do not match at all. Then, that group of friends may not be the right circle for you.

You do not need to dim your light for someone else. All you need to do is stop being anxious about yourself and go hang out with the people who make you comfortable in your own skin.

Also read: How to identify toxic friendships?

Also read: 8 types of people you must stay away from.

Work on your mindset.

“The world hates me.” It is a common conclusion that a person with social anxiety derives every time they are stuck in a social situation. And this is the mindset that you need to change.

Counter this thought by instantly saying, “So, what?” This will give you a boost instantly. It will not only change your perspective but it will also make you more carefree in your approach.

You need to understand that everyone is loved by a few and hated by many. But that does not stop them from doing what they want to do in this world. And if you achieve that level of functioning, you have already won your fight against social anxiety.

One of the biggest examples is Elon Musk. At the time of my writing this article, Elon is the most important person in America, probably next to President Donald Trump. If you have seen the old interviews or public appearances of Mr. Musk, you will realize he has extreme social anxiety.

But that never stopped him from doing what he wanted to do and what he wanted to achieve. Him, being right or wrong is a different topic of discussion but his persistence is quite admirable.

Know who you are and behave as such.

Another way people hide their social anxiety is by making an alternate personality for people. They think if people never know the real them, they will never judge them. However, soon they feel more lost than ever because they think no one understands them or really knows them.

Therefore, it is important to know who you truly are. You would not be scared of the people perceiving you in a certain way. And after a while, you will stop caring about them and their opinions. Thus, combating your social anxiety successfully.

In this way, you won’t have to look for escapism, create a different social personality, and also save yourself from a lot of embarrassing moments that you later feel bad about.

Also read: 8 things to know about yourself.

Observe that no one cares.

One of the most practical activities to win over social anxiety is to simply throw yourself in public. Sit in a crowded place all alone and do some people-watching.

Observe the people and see that everyone is so busy living their own lives that no one is thinking about anyone else. You will realize you had nothing to worry about in the first place.

All you need to do is to win over yourself.

Also read: 10 ways to stop sabotaging yourself.

Also read: 10 ways to save yourself from gaslighting.

Conclusion.

All the tips shared above can help you win over social anxiety sustainably. However, nothing can replace support from a friend or a therapist. Sometimes, the cause of social anxiety can be deeply rooted. It can be trauma, the environment you grew up in, or your upbringing.

All of this combined can make your emotions and anxiety complex to understand. Therefore, don’t feel shy to ask for help. The journey of understanding and winning over your anxiety will become much easier for you.

Also read: 10 instant hacks to deal with your anxiety.